Perhaps some day you will realize that...in the weirdest sense, i like you, not as some quiet drop of morning dew on a maple leaf that, before the first ray of sunlight settles in, ceases to be.
...but...as a true friend. More or less.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
Monday, August 13, 2007
My summer 2007 commute
Thoughts on the home-bound express train:
"Every station passed...
is a few blocks closer."
"Every station passed...
is a few blocks closer."
Sunday, August 12, 2007
i thought...
...i had so much to tell (with three drafts piled up along my assembly line), but it turned out that i did not say anything.
Must be the heat :-)
Must be the heat :-)
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Realization of absurdity
First time we talked about Samuel Beckett in college, i found the word "absurdity" itself quite an absurd instance. If the word can actually logically define itself, i guess my point was that "absurdity" is an occurrence that happens by comparison.
But today on the subway home, when i sensed how rapidly we were traveling in that long, dark tunnel, that absurdity suddenly seized me. Inside the train, small groups of people here and there were loudly chatting, at the same time firmly holding on to where they were. It was only a short moment, but that absurdity was for real.
But today on the subway home, when i sensed how rapidly we were traveling in that long, dark tunnel, that absurdity suddenly seized me. Inside the train, small groups of people here and there were loudly chatting, at the same time firmly holding on to where they were. It was only a short moment, but that absurdity was for real.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Action movies
About 6 p.m. yesterday evening, the night before 4th of July, we decided at the very last minute to finally take advantage of Sam's complimentary AMC tickets (which were part of some nice Christmas gifts from work a while back).
We meant to go for "1408", and we did. i've always enjoyed nice thrills for some breath-holding moments and totally unexpected, chilling scares. There is definitely a reason why thrillers sell. And yet, to me, another genre has a tighter grasp, and is simply...above and beyond. When we were done with "1408", i did not want to leave, because, right next to it, "Live Free Or Die Hard" was playing in another twenty minutes.
i know i do not blog about movies unless there is some point i want to get to. Movies, as always, are a quiet existence in my journal, along with dated ticket stubs and, mostly, my thoughts. So, right...i am still not blogging about "Live Free Or Die Hard" here, even though i truly think Bruce Willis is such an amazingly classy action hero. He is just...THE guy.
In college, i went to movies a lot, mostly alone, and action movies were my priority for sure. As people always say, if you want to see action, you gotta see it on the big screen. An action movie - or the element of "adventure" in it - is a continuation of our childhood fantasies, in which most people get to, for a short couple of hours, escape the banality of life. The hero is brave, makes quick, right decisions, and never dies. He is always the last man standing - a real-life superman...on the screen.
i LOVE adventure, but in reality, i probably wouldn't be able to handle it too well (look what my adrenaline can do!), and to be honest, i am fine with my normal life :-) As i'm getting older these years, i am also drawn to comedy, but deep inside, i know that good action movies will aaalllways be my favorite. Perhaps i am just like the kid in "Last Action Hero" (a metafictive action movie, or...a meta-action?): the dream is there for ever.
We meant to go for "1408", and we did. i've always enjoyed nice thrills for some breath-holding moments and totally unexpected, chilling scares. There is definitely a reason why thrillers sell. And yet, to me, another genre has a tighter grasp, and is simply...above and beyond. When we were done with "1408", i did not want to leave, because, right next to it, "Live Free Or Die Hard" was playing in another twenty minutes.
i know i do not blog about movies unless there is some point i want to get to. Movies, as always, are a quiet existence in my journal, along with dated ticket stubs and, mostly, my thoughts. So, right...i am still not blogging about "Live Free Or Die Hard" here, even though i truly think Bruce Willis is such an amazingly classy action hero. He is just...THE guy.
In college, i went to movies a lot, mostly alone, and action movies were my priority for sure. As people always say, if you want to see action, you gotta see it on the big screen. An action movie - or the element of "adventure" in it - is a continuation of our childhood fantasies, in which most people get to, for a short couple of hours, escape the banality of life. The hero is brave, makes quick, right decisions, and never dies. He is always the last man standing - a real-life superman...on the screen.
i LOVE adventure, but in reality, i probably wouldn't be able to handle it too well (look what my adrenaline can do!), and to be honest, i am fine with my normal life :-) As i'm getting older these years, i am also drawn to comedy, but deep inside, i know that good action movies will aaalllways be my favorite. Perhaps i am just like the kid in "Last Action Hero" (a metafictive action movie, or...a meta-action?): the dream is there for ever.
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
June 2007...such a long way
Took me years to finally be unblinded from this frustrating revelation: i am fighting a battle that is never won. Never did, and never will.
It used to be fine being the submissive. Sometimes, the simplicity of life, of not asking, of not sensing, proves to be a true blessing. For years, i had hardly questioned my role in this domestic reality, until that phone conversation with J a while back. "You should always push," she said, "don't be the good one." It made sense, i thought. So i fought. And i've been losing.
i wonder if it's all going to come down to the fact that, although some people have no trouble at all, this golden rule just would not work for me. Wait a second, if it doesn't work for me, then it is not a golden rule!
Turns out that June 2007 is such a revealing combination of month and year.
It used to be fine being the submissive. Sometimes, the simplicity of life, of not asking, of not sensing, proves to be a true blessing. For years, i had hardly questioned my role in this domestic reality, until that phone conversation with J a while back. "You should always push," she said, "don't be the good one." It made sense, i thought. So i fought. And i've been losing.
i wonder if it's all going to come down to the fact that, although some people have no trouble at all, this golden rule just would not work for me. Wait a second, if it doesn't work for me, then it is not a golden rule!
Turns out that June 2007 is such a revealing combination of month and year.
Monday, March 19, 2007
One machine load of free laundry...
...and a long queue and a grumpy evening?
Some time last Friday when the spring break finally came and it smelled wet outside the window, our floor CA sent an email specifying out-of-order machines in the laundry room.
According to the facility office, these machines had trouble dealing with rugs. Towards the end of the email, in a corner that most people might've neglected due to a habit of skipping information, our CA added that, "Also know that machine 25 is now working without needing to put money on it. This is only temporary until the system is completely fixed."
Wasn't it inviting? i actually wondered if she meant to ask the residents to go down for one machine load of free laundry, and was just curious how people would react to that email.
With the question in mind, i immediately pulled up the LaundryView Monitoring System in my browser. In about ten minutes, Machine #25...and watch this! ONLY Machine #25...lighted up and started vibrating on my computer screen. Right! Someone read through the email for sure!
Later through that night, Machine #25 kept its busy status, while the seven other washing machines remained unoccupied. i was like, "c'mon guys, it's just one dollar!" until Sam pulled me away from in front of the computer screen. i thought they were obsessed with that one dollar, but obviously...i was also obsessed watching people obsessed with that one dollar....
Some time last Friday when the spring break finally came and it smelled wet outside the window, our floor CA sent an email specifying out-of-order machines in the laundry room.
According to the facility office, these machines had trouble dealing with rugs. Towards the end of the email, in a corner that most people might've neglected due to a habit of skipping information, our CA added that, "Also know that machine 25 is now working without needing to put money on it. This is only temporary until the system is completely fixed."
Wasn't it inviting? i actually wondered if she meant to ask the residents to go down for one machine load of free laundry, and was just curious how people would react to that email.
With the question in mind, i immediately pulled up the LaundryView Monitoring System in my browser. In about ten minutes, Machine #25...and watch this! ONLY Machine #25...lighted up and started vibrating on my computer screen. Right! Someone read through the email for sure!
Later through that night, Machine #25 kept its busy status, while the seven other washing machines remained unoccupied. i was like, "c'mon guys, it's just one dollar!" until Sam pulled me away from in front of the computer screen. i thought they were obsessed with that one dollar, but obviously...i was also obsessed watching people obsessed with that one dollar....
Tuesday, January 2, 2007
Superhuman
During this holiday season, Sam and i watched the first season of the "Heroes" on NBC.com. Although the characters are super-human, the theme is "survive or perish", beyond the usual "good vs. evil" scope.
Instead of a fantasy, the storyline had it set up so it is a scientifical and genetical possibility that humans evolve into super-humans. If, according to Darwin, we were apes in the first place, then human evolution (again) might not be entirely a crazy idea.
While we were watching the 9th episode, i asked Sam which super-power he would choose if he was given the opportunity; he picked Hiro's ability of bending time and space. Later that night, we happened to come across a two-hour Sci-fi original investigation into the Bermuda Triangle...and i began to wonder (with my limited human cognition and intelligence) how our earthly rules could keep working if humans evolve into time-stopping and space-bending beings. It is literally like...numerous Bermuda Triangles on this planet, and these black holes overlap with one another - how does our linear world physically interact with this...anomaly? But on the other hand, i am obviously asking this question as a normal human being.... After all, 1,000 years ago, people could never have imagined what we have today, could they?
Instead of a fantasy, the storyline had it set up so it is a scientifical and genetical possibility that humans evolve into super-humans. If, according to Darwin, we were apes in the first place, then human evolution (again) might not be entirely a crazy idea.
While we were watching the 9th episode, i asked Sam which super-power he would choose if he was given the opportunity; he picked Hiro's ability of bending time and space. Later that night, we happened to come across a two-hour Sci-fi original investigation into the Bermuda Triangle...and i began to wonder (with my limited human cognition and intelligence) how our earthly rules could keep working if humans evolve into time-stopping and space-bending beings. It is literally like...numerous Bermuda Triangles on this planet, and these black holes overlap with one another - how does our linear world physically interact with this...anomaly? But on the other hand, i am obviously asking this question as a normal human being.... After all, 1,000 years ago, people could never have imagined what we have today, could they?
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