A political poem

i see blooming greenish land and trees,
right by the lovely blue sea,
up above shines the orange sun --
that is where i came from.

Letting go...

i've always thought that letting go was one of the hardest things in my world.

But you see...today, when they were walking down the street, away from my sight, i realized...letting go, after all, might be an easier job than trying to hang on to something that is meant to go away.

...Perhaps...it has something to do with the fact that i am already in my thirties?

Weakest link

Once in a while, it would come to a point where i need to take a long moment from work and go use the restroom. Very often, the restroom is empty, and there is no one but me.

Occasionally, someone will come in and join the silence. i will hear sounds that resemble the door, some seat paper, and..., the flush, and then the soap being pressed, followed by some washing.

Sometimes, among that occasionally, sounds of the soap and the washing will not be there. My curiosity will rise, and i will be wanting to see who it is to omit those sounds. But i always sit there and wonder, "These people are educated; why did they forget to wash their hands?"

Until today...i realized, human beings are probably the only creatures over the planet that wash the hands. There is always the fear of bacteria, germs, virus, whatsoever, and there are commercials selling products claiming that, once you spray them on your kitchen countertop, they kill all the bad things.

And yet, with these precautions, humans are still constantly knocked down by a cold, flu, diarrhea, and some infection. We are by all means the weakest link, at the same moment as we are convinced our civilization has made us the smartest.

Crossing the line

Last Saturday on TNT, we watched two movies in a row, two movies that we saw a long time ago: Signs, and Mothman Prophecies.

What is the odds showing films like these, one right after another? In The Signs, Mel Gibson was afraid of crossing that "fine thread of sanity", of mentally stepping away from the human comfort zone, the normal territory -- afraid of wandering off to that "other" side.

Human beings, as distinctly intelligent and free-willed as they claimed themselves to be, are trained and encouraged to stay on "this" side of the line, the line of "seeing is believing", which unfortunately is also the line of human limits. Even when we/they actually see (e.g., what happens in Mothman Prophecies), we/they still do not believe. Instead, as if it was some impulse, we/they immediately try to make sense out of it -- our sense, or, human sense -- within some sensible and comprehensible boundary. Still, it's that fear of crossing over and losing our sanity.

Collecting the memories?

When i was downstairs "obeying the alternate side parking rules", i found myself staring at the sky and lost...in time.

Maybe she was right. Maybe each eyeful of it links to some particular memory...like a mesmerized soul when the 80s music is playing.

Last three months

What happens when people are told they have three months left, not necessarily of their life, but of membership, lease, relationship, ownership, or partnership, etc?

Does the fact make us cherish what we have? i guess human beings react to it in all possible ways. For me, i am sensing some type of remote yet approaching agony.

The Mystery of Ever-changing Airfare

"Nobody knows. It changes practically everyday."
-- Jessica (played by Gaby Hoffmann), in Sleepless in Seattle, while asked how much it costs to fly from Seattle to New York City on Valentine's Day.

Recently, for our trip to AERA, which is going to be held in San Francisco early April, i had been doing a lot of research online.

Take the airfare from New York City for example - leave alone the fact that flying from New York City means three options (LaGuardia, JFK, and Newark) and flying into San Francisco could mean two different nearby airports (SF Int'l Airport and Oakland Int'l Airport) - it IS indeed changing everyday, and the price of a roundtrip ticket could go from $253 to $876! It surely is not about waiting or getting the ticket in advance; it is pure luck.

Isn't this alone NOT going to make tacit agreement between adults an incomprehensible experience? While the fares are manipulated by the airlines in some mysterious ways, the currency, the price of gold in the global market...or even the agreement among adults to pay some arbitrarily defined monetary rewards, to begin with...are all parts of the foundation that our civilization is built upon. Or...is it ever mine?

Blogging and my detail orientation

Two weeks ago when i was finishing up one written assignment for a class, i suddenly realized that i was proofreadiing my writeup over and over again. And i used to hate it.

Because of its public nature, i automatically began to stay VERY aware of my grammar, wording, and the way i describe something. Before i publish one entry, i always re-read, tri-read, quadra-read, and panta-read - just to make sure i do not make any simple mistakes, as if my blog actually meant more than the assignments i submitted before! (Maybe in a way it is!)

But then...it's the same ownership. i am still the writer...is it implying that it is the reader that is making all the differences?

Over- and under-estimation

i think i overestimated the seriousness and underestimated my concern about the nasal congestion. i should always "suffer and be strong", according to one of my favorite quotes.

Being silently active?

The oxymoron should describe well my brain activity...